Gratitude #6


Many years ago, my mother was brought to a neurologist because we suspected something wasn’t quite right. She seemed a little forgetful, but more importantly, we suspected she was making things up to cover up her memory loss. She also seemed “simple”, as opposed to being complex. Life was pared down, simplified, broken down to concrete, discrete ideas.

I am grateful to the neurologist for his kindness and the gentle way he explained the diagnosis. How he encouraged us to enrol her in daycare, so that her days would be richer. How he listened when we described her response to the medications he put her on.

He accompanied us on the path over the years as Mom gradually got worse. He was realistic but never made us feel hopeless.

Over the years since the diagnosis, I think we coped quite well. Yet yesterday was the first time Mom looked at me blankly when I asked her a question as though trying to remember who I was. Such a long pause. Then I asked her if she knew who she was. She smiled and started to tell me but couldn’t say her own name.

Is this it? That stage of dementia that every recognises and identifies as dementia?

I don’t know, but I do know I am grateful for the many years we have enjoyed since being given the diagnosis.

7 thoughts on “Gratitude #6”

  1. Stay positive and I hope you mum’s dementia will not regress further. I too, pray for my dad’s condition to remain status quo but I know it is never real. You have done well. Stay strong.

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  2. My mom have it also. It’s sad but on the other hand with medicines (which are quite good these days and soon getting better for future generations) she can be ok for long time…and dementia is not killing itselfs…and I think it’s kind of great that you can live on your own world and probably feel yourself younger (they usually live on the past). Like my mom “was having my graduatings” some time ago at senior home, even those where almost 20 years ago…but my mom luckily still recognise me…Sometimes she seems to be quite normal like she’s living in this precise moment. I can’t be sure but atleast we can usually still have (quite) normal discussions which is great! In future the progress of this disease can be likely suspended with that new medicine and that’s awesome! So if we get dementia in future, it maybe isn’t so bad!

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