Hazy Update


I’ve been meaning to write, just didn’t get organised enough to do so. Some ideas don’t bear closer scrutiny, and fall by the wayside. Anyway, here’s an update of sorts.

The weather has been mostly hazy. Grey and smoky. The sun, when we do see it, is an angry red ball. There may be one clear day every ten days, when the wind shifts. By my estimate, the forest fires should be done by the end of this month, and November will be better.

Mom is calm and happy. Occasionally we catch her doing something she shouldn’t, like trying to take a bath fully clothed. But all in all, we are managing. Conversations can be amusing or fascinating, or astounding. One example:

Me, holding a banana: What’s this?
Mom: Mango!
Me: No, no! Look again, what’s this? B-a-n-a…..
Mom: Mango!
Me: I know you love mangoes, but we’re out of mangoes. Here, have this banana.

Mom catches on to emotions of those around her very well. She is still sensitive though the words don’t come so easily. She knows who she likes, and who she dislikes. She’s consistent that way.

She’s nice. Affable. Totally accepting of what is. When she says, “I don’t remember anymore”, it is a statement of fact. She smiles as she says it. But she is clear, because underlying that and unspoken is, “Don’t even try to remind me. I don’t remember, and it doesn’t matter.”


12 thoughts on “Hazy Update”

  1. Thank you for liking my blog post. I am in awe of how brilliantly you are coping with your mum, you are a role model for so many who find it impossible to manage. I will be reading your blog regularly to be inspired as to how I could be a better daughter. I send my warmest good wishes!


  2. If your mum says it’s a mango, then for the time being, it’s a mango. People working in the long-term care of Alzheimer sufferers have found that stepping into their reality is much less stressful for both the carers and the sufferer.


  3. My husband and I are full time caregivers of my mother-in-law with dementia. I enjoyed your “conversation” with your mom. The minute I think my mother-in-law can’t understand what I’m saying anymore, she surprises me. The other day, I woke her up gently from her nap. I said, “You’re all snug in a cocoon.” She said, “I’m not ready to come out yet.”


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